From the blog that brought you "Twas the Night Before Hockey Christmas" comes "Twas the Night Before Game 7":
Twas the night before Game 7 and it was back in our house
Wardo has a nasty shiner (not from his spouse).
Claude and Mo's words were chosen with care,
While something tells me there's a little more there.
The B's faithful were nestled all snug in their beds,
While visions of cheap shots ran through their heads.
I call it a sucker punch, but Caniacs call it a love tap,
It's funny how he can have such a different recap.
When out on the net there arose such a clatter,
I sprang to The News & Observer to see what was the matter.
Away to the small market rag's site I flew like a flash,
Only to find Luke DeCock spewing out more trash.
Scott Walker is definitely the Bruins' new foe
He got off easy thanks to the Colin Campbell shit show.
When, what to my wondering eyes should appear,
But a well placed slash by Jussi from the rear.
With a bunch of "defenseless little guys", so lively and quick,
Instead of throwing the body, they'd rather use their stick.
More rapid than eagles these hackers they came,
And Mo whistled, and shouted, and called them by name!
"Now Jussi! now, Tuomo! now, Chad and Ray!
On, Cullen! On, Walker! on, on Eaves and Sergei!
To the back of the ankle! and watch the big man fall!
Now slash away! Slash away! Slash away all!"
Some want to see the haymakers start to fly,
While I'd rather see the B's lift Lord Stanley to the sky.
There is no club with more members than the Lucic Crew,
If he was playing for your team, you'd love him too.
Still work to be done to raise a banner to the roof
Aaron Ward agreed to fight? Where's the proof?
The Canes made a mistake by thinking about next round,
But where will the Caniacs be be when the champion is crowned?
One guy was dressed in Whale gear, from his head to his foot,
And his clothes were all tarnished with ashes and soot.
These clowns aren't welcome at The Garden, yet they still come back,
As they search for a hockey team not named the Wolfpack.
Games 2,3, and 4 looked kind of scary
This isn't a conspiracy orchestrated by Gary
Where are all the little Canes' trolls that used to crow,
Now that their team has lost 2 in row?
The Caniacs don't like cracks about NASCAR and having no teeth,
But love to watch Samsonov circle the rink like a wreath.
There were some candid words spoken by Peter Chiarelli,
We all know the Hurricanes style is softer than jelly.
Then there is Chad LaRose, a right jolly little elf,
But it takes more than that to put Savard on the shelf!
Game 7 sold out faster than a Walker punch to the head,
With all the momentum, I know we have nothing to dread.
Mo spoke about bruised knuckles and gave a little smirk,
Can this guy be any more of an arrogant jerk?
And when this series comes to a close,
The Caniacs can get back to their monster truck shows
The Canes love to talk about the lack of whistle,
while Jussi's hack was as accurate as a patriot missile.
I hope to hear Jack Edwards exclaim, tomorrow night,
"Enjoy the off season Canes. You put up a good fight!"