Ways that Patrick Kane could have spent that $1.20

by Stanley Cup of Chowder on Aug 9, 2009 5:05 PM EDT Comment 15 comments

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You may have heard by now that 20 year old Chicago Blackhawks forward Patrick Kane was arrested early this morning along with his cousin after allegedly assaulting a cab driver in his hometown of Buffalo. The pair allegedly punched and choked the cab driver and stole money from the man. According to reports, the driver was unable to make exact change when he was given $15.00 for a $13.80 fare. If these charges are in fact true, Patrick is both cheap and an awful human being. So this begs the question: what does a millionaire NHL hockey player need with a $1.20?

The following is a list of ways that Patrick Kane could have spent that $1.20 in Buffalo:

One Suicidal Wing from Anchor Bar

Scott Norwood replica jersey

O.J. Simpson's Heisman Trophy

A bag of commerative asbestos from the Buffalo Memorial Auditorium

Drive from Buffalo Airport to Niagara Falls

1/4 of a beer at the HSBC Arena....You know, if he were 21

Frank Reich's 1992 AFC Championship ring

Down payment on a starter home in Buffalo

120 pulls on one of the penny slot machines at Delaware North's Fairgrounds Gaming and Raceway

Donate $1.20 to Marshawn Lynch to help him pay for his legal fees

Exchange it for $1.30 Canadian, go over the border and drink legally

A night with a high class Buffalo area escort

Pay one of Delaware North's employees their hourly pay

Go on a dollar menu date (Dutch of of course) with the disgusting fat pig that heckles Aaron Ward

Pretend you are Drew Rosenhaus and prank call Terrell Owens

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He could of spent the $1.20 on some discount steroids so he could be strong enough to actually fight in the NHL

by SMF360 on Aug 9, 2009 7:31 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs

He might need that if has to serve any time. A kid that looks like him isn’t going do too well in prison.

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by Stanley Cup of Chowder on Aug 9, 2009 8:01 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs

I've read that he wanted just 20 cents back to tip the guy a dollar

If he wanted 1.20 back that makes it even worse because he wasn’t planning on tipping. Hilarious post, man.

Donate $1.20 to Marshawn Lynch to help him pay for his legal fees

— FTW

Detroit4lyfe

by Detroit4lyfe on Aug 9, 2009 9:12 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs

Holy Crap you ass

this had me loling like crazy

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by Joe Fortunato on Aug 9, 2009 11:07 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs

Hmm

A phone call, collect

Ass plug… well almost

A advertisement in the paper
“Man whore will work for free.” or “I had a pair of tits once, but the doctors told me they would grow back.”

Oh wait he’s in prison.

by Rangers Bleed Blue on Aug 10, 2009 1:28 AM EDT reply actions 0 recs

A night with a high class Buffalo area escort lol

by army of adam on Aug 10, 2009 3:10 AM EDT reply actions 0 recs

jacobs

…i need a rant on the upcoming season ticket prices, last years 42.40 seats in the corner are now going for $71. that is inane not even the bandwagoners can afford it nvm college kids and the working man, this is bs dont turn causeway st into yawkee way

by Conor Mc on Aug 10, 2009 3:31 AM EDT reply actions 0 recs

Speaking of Tickets

Does anyone know if they are going to sell mini-plans this year?

If regular season tickets start going on sale in 10 days, I’d think they’d have released those plans by now…….

by 13_Legion on Aug 10, 2009 10:49 AM EDT up reply actions 0 recs

They are doing some of them, but its changed a bit. I believe the information is out, at least for renewals.

Join me on the Hockey Blog Adventure! (or Twitter.) GO BRUINS! (and Wild!)

by Cornelius Hardenbergh on Aug 11, 2009 1:28 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs

Yeah, I jumped the gun.

No more than an hour after I posted that question, I got an e-mail for renewal, and I’m all set for next season!

I was just worried that I was just getting the run around from the ticket office.

by 13_Legion on Aug 11, 2009 2:09 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs

They told me to wait and then called me, too. I’m back in the same seats. YESSSSSSSSS

Join me on the Hockey Blog Adventure! (or Twitter.) GO BRUINS! (and Wild!)

by Cornelius Hardenbergh on Aug 11, 2009 7:23 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs

Still, more money for less games? At least I’m sitting a few rows closer…..

by 13_Legion on Aug 12, 2009 9:56 AM EDT up reply actions 0 recs

I like my seats a lot, actually. Right behind a handicap section, so I’ve got a little balcony thing.

Join me on the Hockey Blog Adventure! (or Twitter.) GO BRUINS! (and Wild!)

by Cornelius Hardenbergh on Aug 14, 2009 3:04 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs

You got to wonder if the cabbie is just trying to stiff him cause he is in the NHL. For all ya know the cabbie could have started it. Kane was a good kid when he was in London playing for the Knights It will be interesting to follow the story on this.

Buins Rule

by BeantownBDH on Aug 10, 2009 6:19 PM EDT reply actions 0 recs

that was my first reaction on the whole thing. who’s to say the cabbie didnt recognize Kane and invent a whole story to make some money? the hawks/kane would prbly pick a private payment to settle any dispute than go to court and bring more publicity

by skly27 on Aug 13, 2009 3:24 PM EDT up reply actions 0 recs

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