FanPost

SCOC Memes and other things you should know (if you are new here)



Newcomers! Welcome to Stanley Cup of Chowder, where Bruins fans come to commiserate and trade amusing gifs of (usually) limited relevance to hockey- Bruins or otherwise!

Back during the playoffs there was minor talk of a post laying out the common memes and recurring jokes 'round these parts, as visiting fans of other teams and recently joined SCOCers tend to get a little confused at first, unless they've been lurking for some time. So here, on the cusp of a new season, our common themes memes and other sundries can be laid out for your benefit! Some of these jokes have specific posters and bloggers that they can be attributed to, but we won't be giving credit here for things that have been incorporated into the SCOC lexicon. Other themes, namely player nicknames, won't be expounded either (except in specific cases), as they either come from the players themselves, or from the prophet, Jack Edwards, himself. If you've found your way here, we can assume you know them all and more.

Veterans are welcome to take issue with any mistakes and then add their own!

So, without further adieu, here we go!

Corgi- An adorable dog, familiar and (seemingly, to some, not me) obsessed with advanced stats, such as Corsi, PDO, and others that I pretend to fully understand (disclosure: 50/50 at best). When mentioned, it is acceptable (or required) to post pictures and gifs of corgis, especially Lobster Dog, lord of Corsi Corgis (aka TomServo42)

Oflodnap- He who must not be named, the possession black hole. Never say his name 3 times in a single thread, or much like Beetlejuice, he will appear and never leave the roster. Ever.

Gif Jennings- Semi-competitive .gif posting sweepstakes, run by the gif masters (and SCOC youth movement) Birda and Bobby16May. Also relates to how-to guides on posting gifs and other images

Sparkle Ponies- If you haven't met Birda yet, just wait, you'll find out

Goat and Broom- Members of our defensive depth, to whom all other Bruins defensemen (not named Chara or Seidenberg) must be compared to. If either of these are better than you, you belong either in Providence or the Press Box, delivering Nachos to Chiarelli/Neely/Sweeney

#TeamPooh- Followers of the greatest third jerseys ever worn by the Bruins

#TeamNotPooh- There's no accounting for bad taste

#ChowderAfterDark- Any good double entendre (especially ones that require a reeeeall stretch of the dirty mind), to be deployed like 'That's what she said', except no one will punch you in the arm for being a douche

Sparkly BAMF- The Flying Finnish King. There is no other

Loleafs- Never inappropriate

Ryan Callahan- If mentioned, always shout his name and discuss grit, because WWPMD?

Bring in a third team to make it work, Shock the World - Things to be said when discussing absurd, HFboards-type trades. Or really any other time. This is a good one.

Anything autoracing- Arenacale's influence on us all. Don't be surprised to see a morning thread wander off this way.

HEOTP- A Habs blog here on SBNation. If you go over there and disagree with them, or 'Troll', you will be banned indiscriminately and unjustly. Basically a third world banana republic. Proceed at your own risk.

Jerkshire- Willfully obtuse Managing Editor at our hated enemy, Habs Eye on the Prize (HEOTP, EOTP). Actually named Andrew Berkshire, but hes a jerk. So there's that

#BerkshireLogic- The logic that any time, anywhere, a player (usually a Hab) gets injured, it was due to a malicious and illegal hit from one or more Bruins. Does not exclude injuries sustained while driving cars in player's home countries during the offseason (probably, this theory is untested).

#Offersheettheactivestick- Laura is pretty great despite being a Habs fan and blogger. Its a shame to see such talent wasted

Fuck Matt Cooke- With a rusty wire brush. You know this, but it bears constant repeating.

Pile on the Isle- SCOC road trip to the Nassau Veterans Memorial Coliseum. Its days are numbered.

Hoity YouTube- Something about drinking wine. Probably should let Phony or Heather or Sarah explain this one.

#TypicalBessieMoss- The ladies of SCOC. Named for the woman who named the Bruins. See above posters for details.

Not Water- Alcohol. Terminology only acceptable when hungover on a weekday morning.

Calling players girls (e.g. Crosby, Sedins)- Don't do this. This is where our Resident Masshole spiked the ball and left us all forever.

MicDrop- You know what this is, but some folks don't take kindly to treating A/V equipment this way. Proceed as you will.

Facepunching/Punchicizing/Embarrassing Vancouver Reporters- Things Shawn Thornton does well (see also: "Suck it, Felger")

Hockey- Something Shawn Thornton doesn't do well, but (most) of us forgive due to the above (mainly the last one).

Fighting- Something Greg Campbell probably shouldn't do. It never goes well.

#AlltheSubbans- Gotta catch 'em all (Stupid Habs and Canucks)

#OfferSheetPK- See above

Milkman's Son- Because Chris Bourque can't possibly be the Son of God, can he?

Clutchy McCageface/Cageface/Shinoda- The many names of one Chris Kelly, once and future scapegoat (with reason). Once played with a full cage over his face, has been clutch at times. Don't get the other one myself.

DOY- Days of Y'Orr, a funny as hell, but boisterous Bruins blog. Gets more love than we do from the hockey world at large.

PD- Puckdaddy. Wyshinski good, Lambert bad. Mooney a Canucks fan. Or something. Given that this is probably how you found us, this one is unnecessary

Yippee Paille Motherfucker!- Not Seventh Player Award worthy. Apparently. Possibly half Pelican.

Joe Haggerty/Kevin Paul Dumont- The less said, the better

Pierre Mcguire, Doc Emrick... fuck this, the whole NBC broadcast team- See above

Powerplay- A good time to go to the washroom or get another beer.

Powerkill- Effective, unlike above

MartyParty!- Marty Turco. He gets it. See also: #VelveetaSaves

Recch!- Rec. Except with 1000% more Mark Recchi

EDITS:

BRUINS ENIGMA WIN WIN- Playoff slogan of short-term good luck charm and all-around mystery person, Jaroslav

Ponybombing- The tactical deployment of Birda and/or Bobby16May armed with Sparkle Ponies against opposing team's game threads. It is not advised to invoke this without a named target.

#BlakeWheelersFault- If a Bruins is offsides, guess who really did it

A Whole Team of Blake Friggin' Wheelers- See above

Punch All The Whales!- Because Canucks need punchin' too

Looks like an 'A' to me!- Its impossible to fail your season-ending grades after winning the Cup. Unless you're Tomas Kaberle.

Potato- Not an expressly SCOC meme, but this root vegetable would be a far better GM than Dave Nonis

Quo**- Don't say it, don't think it. Remove this word from your vocabulary. At least until we've scored our sixth goal. If you so much as think it, Gozer will send the destructor in the form of the the Stay Puft Marshmallow man

Hey Guys Bear (TM)- A wild and crrraaazy guy

Okay, I've run out of important ones. Everyone add what I've forgotten!

Many FanPosts are written by readers and do not necessarily reflect the views of Stanley Cup of Chowder, SB Nation, their sponsors, or business partners.

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