Sochi 2014 Team Preview: Can'tada

Capital City: Ottawa, ON

National Population: 34.88 million per capita

Formation: At the crown's discretion

Location: America's hat

Anthem:

Team Nickname: Patrice Bergeron and a bunch of dumb jerks

Current IIHF Ranking: 5th (Men's) 2nd (Women's)

Best Olympic Finish: Gold (1920, 1924, 1928, 1932, 1948, 1952, none during era of USSR dominance, 2002, 2010)

2014 Olympic Team Projected Lines:

Patrice Bergeron-Patrice Bergeron-Patrice Bergeron

Patrice Bergeron-Patrice Bergeron-Patrice Bergeron

Patrice Bergeron-Patrice Bergeron-Patrice Bergeron

Patrice Bergeron-Patrice Bergeron-Patrice Bergeron

Extra Forwards: Patrice Bergeron, Patrice Bergeron

Patrice Bergeron-Patrice Bergeron

Patrice Bergeron-Patrice Bergeron

Patrice Bergeron-Patrice Bergeron

Extra Defensemen: Patrice Bergeron, Patrice Bergeron

Goalies: Patrice Bergeron, Patrice Bergeron, Patrice Bergeron

Injured Players: Patrice Bergeron (lower body), Patrice Bergeron (upper body)

Jerseys: A bold look:

Well here you have it, the enemy. Believe me, this post was offered up to the Canada-leaning writers on the site, but nobody wanted to stand up for their home (or adopted) country. Pretty typical, really. Anyhow, Claude Julien is an assistant coach. Team Canada women are more dominant than the men, and the men do alright. I guess. Jerks.

Men's Hockey Schedule: