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Yeah yeah yeah, lists can be lame. But here at BuzzfeedCupOfChowder.com, we believe that anything involving Patrice Bergeron is, by law, perfect.
In honor of Bergeron's 29th birthday, here are 29 reasons why Patrice Bergeron owns.
1. He once looked like this:
Photo via BostInno
2. He enjoys yard work.
3. He once rode a zamboni to the game.
4. He's the only player in NHL history to perform an on-ice guitar solo after scoring a goal.
5. Self-explanatory.
6. He once saved a tiny orange kitten from certain doom.
7. He watches entire seasons of Modern Family on road trips.
8. He likes trophies.
9. A lot.
10. I mean, a real lot.
11. He likes gold...
12. ...and silver.
13. He gives away suites to all Bruins home games.
Image from the Bruins' website
14. BERGERON!
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15. BERGERON!
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16. AND THE BRUINS WIN THE SERIES!
17. He doesn't need fully-functioning ribs. Or shoulders. Or lungs.
18. He doesn't have time for your shit, Josh Gorges.
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19. Or yours, Tyler Myers.
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20. He enjoys ending playoff games...
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21. ...and has been doing so since he was a teenager.
Excuse the quality, it's from 2004.
22. He's a cover boy.
23. Of course.
@NHLBruins the moment when Bergeron helped bring the stretcher out to help Brooks Orpik. #ClassAct #NHL15Bergeron pic.twitter.com/k3iyXmITmk
— Bryan Sweeney (@bsweeney15) May 24, 2014
24. See ya later, Chris Pronger.
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25. He raps, yo.
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26. A goal in a Cup Game 7?
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27. How about two?
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28. He's nearing the Top 10 in all-time games played with the franchise, and he's not even 30 yet.
29. He is Patrice Bergeron.
